Reports :

Letter 1 12-12-07 Hello my love Michael! I very strongly to love you and without you and your letters, me it is very bad. I need in you and in your words. I very strongly wait our meeting and I think, that it will be absolutely fast. Without you and your love, my heart will be empty for ever. I know, that you too want to see me. We like each other, and we should be together. I very much wait for this moment. When I have come to agency I was very well accepted also by all have in detail explained. My love, to me have told that visa B-2 is necessary for me, it is the visa of the tourist and she is valid in Current of 90 days, we with you shall be together all this time and only you and I. Visa B-2 very convenient for us and her will let out in two or three days a maximum, her Do very quickly. Then I have asked how many she will cost also to me have told that the visa costs 417 American dollars. From such words I very much was upset and have told that I have no this money Also has explained that I go to the favourite person and except for him to me who is not necessary. I have asked why the visa costs so dearly and to me have told that the visa costs 150 dollars, 200 dollars Medical insurance and 67 dollars the tax and completely all leaves 417 dollars. After all I began to cry that I have no such money and the agent which has explained all to me has told that I have asked this the sum of money you and it has told if you really love me, will be Necessarily to me to help to arrive to you. I will need the passport for travel abroad and for registration of the visa it is required to me 417 $. I realize, that it very difficultly is very expensive to arrive to you, but I hope, nevertheless to receive this opportunity and to see you! For us in Russia it is very big money, If my salary for a month only 180 $. The decent salary and the big money is considered it for our city and our country very much even. I should pay for an apartment, for all municipal services, to buy products, clothes and cosmetics. Parents too do not have such big money. They still pay now for training of the sister. It too very big sum! At us in Russia in general all dearly loved. And such discrepancy of the prices. That the salary does not suffice on anything for all municipal and family needs. To people the state does not lift the salary, and the prices for products, habitation everyone grow and grow. It is simply awful. And for registration of the passport for travel abroad, are necessary different from editing, from a place of a registration, from work. And each information costs 5 $. Therefore road I do not have such money for registration of the visa! Everywhere one problems! To be together necessary money. Without money I cannot be with you! I can not arrive to you! You to see and embrace! I do not know, that to me now to do. Dear you should think up something! I cannot without you. I together with you shall bear everything, all difficulties but if only you only were together with me. I precisely know, that I can! I know, how it is hard to live in other country. About it I was written by my girlfriend from Germany. She too the same doctor the pediatrist, as well as I. And as to it, not looking - that she the fine expert, it was very hard to receive love and respect, and the status of the patients in another's city, in the another's country. However she has consulted, could go through all and now everyone run only to it. As she the best in the hospital. Not looking that she Russian to it concern as the professional expert. I think, that I too can go through and be arranged all in your country. The most important that you were surrounded always with support of the most favourite person, the favourite husband! I am ready to fly by half of world for a meeting with you as it will be the happiest day in my life. When you have appeared at me, I spoke you that all my life has changed. I have prepared you for a favourite gift for you which I have bought already for a long time specially for you. I ask the God that it has heard our prays, and we have met! Know, that my love only for you. All my life belongs to you. I very strongly want to receive somewhat quicker the letter from you. I want to you and I wait this day. I ask you that you have sped up our meeting. All my friends and relatives are very happy, to hear, that I am in love and soon I shall together with the beloved. And I am happy, that you are happy also your feelings to me completely, are high and strong. I wish you good days and nights. I very much want to kiss you but as I have no such an opportunity now I send you a hot and passionate air kiss. I very much wait our meeting and is ready to fly to you as soon as it becomes possible. Today I have bought the ticket on a train to go to Moscow in embassy to do the visa and your letter which I shall receive tomorrow I shall already read it in Moscow. My love, please make to me translation through system Western Union today and in some days I shall arrive to you and we with you shall be together and I of you when I shall not leave. Dear mine, the address where you should make to me translation into the visa: Russia, Moscow, Trade Finace Bank, street kosmonavtov 2a, for name Olga Spasibkina. It is very a shame to me to ask you this the sum of money, but unfortunately except for you to me who cannot help and houses I have already told that you will help me to arrive to you and I have said good bye to parents and I do not have return way. We very for a long time suffered loneliness, lived the friend without the friend and we deserve to be together and to love all life. I have fallen in love with you all soul up to the depth in my heart. I wait for each your letter. I think, that I shall miss a little on the relatives and friends in your country, but you will be with me and I shall be happy. With your occurrence I began as if the little girl cheerful and cheerful. At the same time I as the patient began to rave about a meeting with you. I have precisely solved all for myself, that I want to see you, I want to be only with you. Sitting today in the morning in the room on a cold floor, having buried the person in knees, I sat and cried and did not want, that someone saw from relatives as to me poorly without you! Before eyes flashed a picture of the past, happiness, pleasure, tears severely burnt my person. Between us of thousand kilometers, hundreds cities, tens streets. It would be desirable to turn arrows forward, all to correct, all to make on the, unfortunately it is not subject to me, it is impossible to correct anything. Every day it would be desirable to pull out to itself heart, it would be desirable to forget. But I believe in you, you know, I shall necessarily come, I shall not throw the love I shall not refuse it. I hate myself, the destiny that she has chosen to me such life, a life far from you. I never could think, that such friendship can become love and you too did not know about it. It passes new day without you, but begins with your letter. Strange you so are far, and I almost do not feel this distance you even can be much closer than those people which in meter from me. It is impossible to measure love in distance, but time, our love for a long time has passed check. I love you as it only is possible, I shall make utmost, that this distance would be only time, I want to be only near to you, I do not want, that others kissed me and embraced, I do not want other eyes, lips and a smile, I do not want others if there is you. I LOVE YOU!!!!! I say good bye to you and I wait for your letter. Loved write to me more likely, I shall go from mind! Always only yours Olga. 12-10-07 Hello my lovely Michael! I am glad to see your letter. How you today? I hope, that all is good. Because at me all is simply wonderful! My love I so is happy, that we write each other and that has met such good person. I have received from you, the letter and a life for me was filled with sense. I start, to understand, that my life is not significant without you as I love you. I always dreamed, to meet such person and to live with it all my life. I already present the future. I spoke with my parents that I can probably leave for America, they only were glad for me, mother and father blessed me if only I was happy. They know, that it and is my happiness. I very much was afraid, that my father will not approve my decision, but on my happiness all happened all opposite. Today I all the day long for a long time thought only of you, how we shall meet you. I represented as you meet me at the airport as we search each other eyes. We find and we rush in embraces each other. About my God as I want to be with you as I want to arrive to you. I for you have good news! My mum has one very good friend who works as the chief accountant, in one of our travel agencies of our city. Mum has told to me, that is necessary with it will talk, we to it descend and we learn how to receive faster the visa. What are necessary for this purpose documents and how many all this will cost. And I in the following letter shall necessarily write to you about everything, that I To learn As I want that time has transferred me through all seas and oceans to you, my lovely! My lovely, I want to tell, that every minute, each second, with each sigh of your and my body I love you even more strongly. So it is strong and up to a pain in soul of anybody so did not like, as you my lovely. You reduce me from mind, I know it, I want it and it is pleasant to me. How it is a pity that you beside are not present, it is a pity to fall asleep without you, to not hear palpation of your heart, to not feel on the body, on a breast on hips of your gentle and strong hands I precisely know they such, you so are far and so you are close with me in my dreams, in my ideas but you beside are not present, it can game can we lunatics? I never shall answer you why you, that pulls me to you but I precisely know that I adore you, I was not enough of me only your letters want to feel you, I want to burn down under you, I want to wake up with you, to die and again to be born minutes of passion with you. To give you the tenderness and to take away your reason. When you will be near to me, you will feel all depth of my Love. When you will be near to me, you will understand, that It has borders, however you cannot reach its coast, will not reach its bottom. Because my Love, being exhaled by a silent key, is spilled by the rough mountain river running into the immense sea. But also the sea of my words is a drop of water at ocean of my love. When you will be near to me, you will scoop a moisture a palm to freshen the person, and will understand, that salt of your tears - only an easy reminder on the ceased storm. When you will be near to me, you will blink from light of the Sun, jumping on waves of a calm. And your head will be begun to whirl from senseless recalculation of their number. When you will be near to me, easy breath of a breeze - the successor of a storm - will drug you the freshness and carelessness. The wind will whisper tenderly: ? I do not know whence you, I do not know whence I, but I want, that you were near to me. ? I believe, that all this will be, when you will be near to me. I very much want, that you were near to me. I wait, when you will be near to me. I hope, that sometime you will tell to me: ? I with you. ? For now let my love beats a pure key, filling with itself the blue chasm merging on horizon with infinity of the sky. Many thanks to you that allowed to love itself! You have learned me to much though, probably, and that has not noticed, - to like, trust in yourself, to understand, forgive and to much to another. Loved! With improbable tenderness it would be desirable to exhale this word. Even if has dreamed, that so it is possible to love, I like! Every day all is more difficult and almost impossible to tame heart in size with a planet, but it is. Also demands incessantly to remember itself. Away mind and sober everyday lives! Is useless to contradict heart. Any dispute with it comes to an end failure. There is no neither tears, nor a grief. There is only a pain. A burning, intolerable pain of heart not subject to medicine. Loved mine Michael, you - very fair name in my soul. You - the one for whom I wait and of whom I dream. Madly, about as like unique in a unique life. Every day - should approach me to you. You understand? This destiny presents me of you. Give the God of forces. Simply forces to live up to our meeting. My God, really I have not gained, have not implored at you the unique meeting? Really for hundreds lonely nights and days to me has not dropped out happiness to touch loved? To touch, words and heart. So it is melancholy from idea, that you are far. Beside, but such far would spread in a lap through all Russia to reduce multikilometer distance. I like, and all is not present you. The love and loneliness overflow me. And all because of you. The Dumas about you have exhausted soul, have exhausted and have dried up. Love, verses and songs all for you. Forces at times absolutely leave me. How to live without you??? To cry it wanted for some reason to me. These are tears of pleasure and grief. Heart breaks, cracks from a pain and wounds. The person how many should go through before will find the love, the happiness? On one question I can not find today the answer. So it is hurt. From within your name is pulled out! At the Ice nights exhausts your image. And I live. The happiness, for loved I wait. I write to you the letter with love. Also I shall subscribe under it blood. I want to tell, that I to flare And feeling, but I do not know, To what on it you will give the answer. I so am afraid to hear "was not present". To me without you to not live one. You, but not mine. Your wonderful eyes, As in broad daylight a thunder-storm: Shine, sparkle. Me that shine kill. And how, tell, to me with it to live? In fact there is nobody to love more! With you I together only in dream. You touched there me So it is gentle, that hurt in a breast. And all bad behind. I live you, I live love. And the signature is lower. The signature blood. It is simple delusion, what you with me do?! I say good bye to you loved! See you soon yours Olga. 12-8-07 Hello my love Michael! I have waited your letter my sun! At last I can feel like quite happy, I can luxuriate in your light and heat of your words, to be warmed by your love. I can present the love, give all saved up ideas and hot emotions. Yes I for a long time hid the emotions, but it is justified - I simply lose gift of speech at reading your letters, as between us such distance. It would be desirable to see your letters daily, hourly, every minute. And it would be desirable even more, that you were with me beside. To go with you under a hand along the street, to feel your presence, are not afraid that on light. It would be desirable to talk to you, to smile, kiss you, to stick. With you so it is good me, so easy and confidently. I catch your love, I see her in your words, I feel her between your lines. I do not want to miss on you, I simply want to be with you beside. I am obliged to the life to you. Without you its sense is dissolved. I do not have you beside, but you are in my head, in my heart. You know itself about it, the truth? You - that for the sake of what I live, you speed up an idea, you allow a life, you fill all with sense. It seems to me, has passed so a lot of time while I have understood it. But now all at us ahead. I love you!!! Be with me. I give you light. I know, you hear me! You are, you live, you exist. Now we necessarily shall together, in fact we have found each other. Thanks you, for your patience. You are necessary for me as air and water. I know, that you very much from me are far, I cannot reach you a hand, I can not, embrace you, cannot feel, your smell which I present also which reduces me from mind, but I know one, that every day I rise with your name, I live with it during all day, I lie down to sleep, and again I remember you. Pretty my and native, in fact every day, only the idea on you forces me to rise. My sun, I LIKE, VERY MUCH you I LOVE!! Loved, I madly miss on you. Yet there was no also an instant that I did not think of us! So it is hard for me. And so it is cold without you. But though you are far, the main thing, that you are. Such kind, tender and loved. And the most important mine! Only mine! I never was afraid of the future, and now I am afraid. I am afraid, that in mine tomorrow there will be no you. And the one who is far, that is for some reason expensive, More strongly feeling of heavy tests When from love there are only splinters. Yes the dream, than weight of justifications is better To me it is terrible. On distance so our happiness the friend up to the friend is easy to lose, break, to not inform. But you with me always. In the afternoon - in my ideas, at night - in my dreams. Native mine! I so love you! You do not imagine, on how many you are expensive and important for me. Only your love helps to live, breathe and trust in you! To me to sustain. Only you and your love. It would be desirable to stretch a hand, to touch you, but it only your image. We are divided with hundreds kilometers. I can look only at him, and me of it so a little. It would be desirable to be closer, as far as physical borders only allow, to kiss you, to embrace, be dissolved in you. What it - as not love? There is no, apparently, a word "Love" cannot express and the 100-th share of a condition of my soul. My condition in general does not have name, it is similar to illness, but I would not like to be treated for it at all. You want, I can get for you a star, I can become a drop of dew on your lips, a breeze in your hair, and want, I simply always shall with you. You now probably sleep, and I - was not present, at us day Even at night I cannot sleep, because too strongly you I love and again I speak you about it On it I shall finish the letter and with the big impatience I shall wait your letter. Always only yours Olga. 12-7-07 Hello the most dear Michael! I have received your answer and as it is usual, and I was so happy. Big to you thanks for your fine image, you have very much liked me. I want to tell to you, that your messages began more than simply letters and words and friendship. I think of you all the days long and nights. And you do not leave my head! I always write to you with all sincerity and care and I receive in the answer still the big heat understanding and respect. You have arisen in my life, and I receive pleasure from dialogue with you. It seems to me, that something the greater, than simply friendship. I for a long time was afraid to admit to myself it, and especially to you. Write to me, what you feel? It is very important for me. There can be we hurry events and we need to learn more about us. To get acquainted closer. But it seems to me, that has passed many years, that I know you as myself. What is the ideas converge. When I read your offers, I understand them, than they will end. But understand me correctly, I write to you it with the big care, respect and care. I do not wa